Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Much Love for Florida

A fellow native Floridian in my office emailed this to me -- I bet a few people will get it:


For those of you who grew up in or spent any significant amount of time in Fl, you will know all of this to be true. For those of you who haven't, here is what it's like in the 'Sunshine State'! This is about as close as you can get to understanding what it's like to be a Floridian!!

1. Socks are only for bowling.
2. You never use an umbrella because you know the rain will be over in five minutes.
3. A good parking place has nothing to do with distance from the store, but everything to do with shade.
4. Your winter coat is made of denim.
5. You can tell the difference between fire ant bites and mosquito bites.
6 . You're younger than thirty but some of your friends are over 65.
7. Anything under 70 is chilly.
8. You've driven through Yeehaw Junction.
9. You could swim before you could read.
10. You have to drive north to get to The South.
11. You know that no other grocery store can compare to Publix.
12. Every other house in your neighborhood had blue roofs in 2004-2005.
13. You've gotten out of school early on Halloween to trick or treat before it got dark.
14. You know that anything under a Category 3 just isn't worth waking up for.
15. You are on a first name basis with the Hurricane list. They aren't Hurricane Charley, Hurricane Frances...but Charley, Frances, Ivan and Jeanne.
16. You know what a snowbird is and when they'll leave.
17. You think a six-foot alligator is actually pretty average.
18. You were twelve before you ever saw snow, or you still haven't.
19. 'Down South' means Key West
20. You think New York driver's licenses should only be valid in New York.
21. Flip-flops are everyday wear.
22. Shoes are for business meetings and church,
23. but you HAVE worn flip flops to church before.
24. Sweet tea can be served at any meal
25. An alligator once walked through your neighborhood.
26. You smirk when a game show's 'Grand Prize' is a trip or cruise to Florida.
27. You measure distance in minutes.
28. You have a drawer full of bathing suits, and one sweatshirt
29. You get annoyed at the tourists who feed seagulls.
30. A mountain is any hill 100 feet above sea level.
32. You think everyone from a bigger city has a northern accent.
33. You know the four seasons really are: hurricane season, love bug season, tourist season and summer.
34. It's not soda, cola, or pop. it's coke, regardless of brand or flavor, 'What kinda coke you want?'
35. Anything under 95 is just warm.
36. You've hosted a hurricane party.
37. You go to a theme park for an afternoon, and know when to get on the best rides. (Space Mountain during the Electric Light Parade!)
38. You understand the futility of exterminating cockroaches.
39. You can pronounce Okeechobee, Kissimmee, Ichnatucknee and Withlacoochee
40. You understand why it's better to have a friend with a boat, than owning a boat yourself.
41. Bumper stickers on the pickup in front of you include: various fish, NRA, NASCAR, Go Gators, and a confederate flag.
42. You were 5 before you realized they made houses without pools.
43. You were 25 when you first met someone who couldn't swim.
44. You've worn shorts and used the A/C on Christmas.
45. You recognize Miami-Dade as 'Northern Cuba'.
46. You dread love bug season.
47. You not only forward this but you understand it!


windsurfwahine said...

Too good...
Now we could use this here in South Texas with very little editing.
Take out #'s 8,11,12,17,19change to South Padre, #23 we have service on the beach. 25,37,39,41 change to various fish, nra and Go Aggies or Longhorns and #45.

James Douglass said...

Nice! I've only been here a couple months, but this seems right on. Here's a couple more I'd like to add.

48. You've had to stop your car to let a flock of peacocks cross the street.

49. You've been in line for the porta-john behind a woman wearing only paint.